Friday, January 18, 2019
Sunday, October 26, 2008
Saturday, October 25, 2008
Cider Bums: John Stephens
Full name: John P. Stephens
Cider Name: Steebles
Other Cider Aliases: Johnny Stee, JayStee, Stephens, Anne of Green
Gayballs, Steeballs, Queebles, Queebly, Grambles, Grabby, Grabs
Date of Birth: 3/28/82
Height: 5'8"
Weight: 300lbs
Race: Caublasian
Eye Color: Hazel
Hair Color: Dark Brown
Education: Otterbein college, and Iggy's mom taught me how to do that
thing with my tongue. She's a spitfire, that one.
Profession: IT Consultant / Systems Engineer
Cider Level: Inner Circle
Cider Power: The ability to drunkenly pontificate for hours on end about
subjects I know very little about yet seemingly convince those around me
that I am worldy and studied. It's bullshitting, jackass.
Favorite Cider Moment: Watching Andy Spencer threaten to make a 2 hour
walk home simply because the food at IHOP was taking to long.
Most Hated Fellow Bum: Ygal Kaufman. Not for anything that he has done
to me, or the kind of person he is, I just think that he could stand to
be taken down a peg or two. Also he is a homeowner.
In your opinion, what makes the Cider Bums the greatest group of friends on the planet?:
Steadfast Devotion, Utter Secrecy, Expansive Networking,
Government Opportunity, Financial Security. Wait, isn't this the website
for "The Skulls"?
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Cider Bums: Jesse Griffiths
Full name: Jesse E. Griffiths
Cider Name: Maboobies
Other Cider Aliases: Mahoosi, booby arms, vomit face, Gayse, Juice, Mahooters
Date of Birth: 5/8/81
Height: 5'9.5"
Weight: Holy shit a whopping 175
Race: no thanks, I'm too fat to run
Eye Color: Blue
Hair Color: Dirty Blond
Education: PHD. In Life. Bitches.
Profession: Student
Cider Level: Inner Circle
Favorite Cider Moment:
When Jon Malangoni told us that he got married and we all had to come face to face
with the fact that Jon is not gay. Lets face it, this moment in Cider history was
a tremendous turning point in life for all of us. Some of us have now to face
tremendous gambling debts [racked up over many years of betting on a members
sexuality], and others of us simply have to let go of that long lived
cider legend, which for some is harder to let go of than money . . . [Tom
please place the picture of Iggy joyfully sniffing a dollar bill here].
Most Hated Fellow Bum: Hate is too week of a word to describe my feelings for all
of the bums.
In your opinion, what makes the Cider Bums the greatest group of friends on the planet?:
No matter how far away, or how long it has been - regardless of what cards life
has dealt us each individually, when we get together, or simply think of the times
that we have shared, it puts a smile on all of our faces and we know that some where
out there a fellow bum is thinking of priceless bum moments. Sometimes i vomit to
think of how much i love all of you.
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Cider Bums: Scott Hamilton
Lets meet the bums... (my comments in parenthesis)
Full name: Scott A. Hamilton
Cider Name: Frogybloop
Other Cider Aliases: Scooter, Scooty Pebbles, Poop, Poopy
Date of Birth: 5/8/1981
Height: 5'10"
Weight: 205
Race: wtf are we including race? (Good call I might take this off for future bums.
I just wanted everybody to know how white Scott was...)
Eye Color: Green
Hair Color: Strawberry Blond
Education: MA in Marine biology
Profession: Student
Cider Level: Founder
Favorite Cider Moment: Impossible to nail down a favorite. Always a fan
of any cider reunion moment. (Cop Out)
Most Hated Fellow Bum: Never cared much for that Ygal fellow...
In your opinion, what makes the Cider Bums the greatest group of friends on the planet?: During my travels, I have yet to find any people
who's jokes play off each other so beautifully.
Sunday, October 12, 2008
Welcome to the Cider Bums!
Ah yes, a Cider Blog. It's about time! Tune in from now on to meet the bums, take a gander inside of the cider lexicon, and learn about the craziest events this side of a Diablo Cody screenplay.
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